Crappy Two-Percent Milk
I’ve just poured milk into Kitty’s dish. She looks forward to this all day.
But wait…. What’s going on here?
Me: (Being sarcastic) “Kitty, you’re going to have to get closer to your milk to drink it.”
Miss Kitty: (deadpan) “Who said I wanted to drink it?”
Me: (with enthusiasm) “It’s your afternoon treat!”
Miss Kitty: (deadpan) “It tastes more like punishment.”
Me: “Oh Kitty…. This is what we drink here. We’re watching our waists.”
Kitty: “I’m not. I want fresh whole cream.”
Me: “We’re watching your waist for you. You have a tendency to gain weight without hardly eating anything.”
Kitty: “Someday, I’m going to escape from this prison and run away to the land of milk and honey.”
Me (The Warden): “We love you anyway Kitty.”